If somebody caught you checking out this book right now, peered over your shoulder and asked you, “so what do you want to buy?” how would you answer them? If you’re like most people, you might launch into an explanation that self love is having high self esteem, a roaring sense of self confidence, the belief that you can do anything you want, etc. You may say that you want this book because you want to feel better about who you are and to stop being so hard on yourself.
Or, if you’re like me, you’ll say, “nothing!” and get a little red in the face. What could be more embarrassing than reading a self help book about learning to love yourself, right?
Well – why? Why is it so strange a topic and why does this book even exist at all? Do you ever see books about, “how to love your wife/husband” or “how to love your kids”?
My theory is that we live in a world where it’s completely normal to be hard on ourselves. Think about it for a minute.
Every one of us has experienced ruthless competitiveness, rejection from those we love and admire, disappointments in our abilities, and the constant message from the media that our lives, and by extension we ourselves, are just no good unless we’re constantly buying the latest gadgets, dieting or accumulating wealth.
We like to call this way of treating ourselves “realistic.” Maybe we believe that it keeps us on our toes, always hungry to improve and “fix” ourselves. Maybe we just assume that love is something we have to earn – but only once we’re awesome enough!
Here, I’m going to ask you how much you love yourself. Be honest. I won’t come peek into your head and check if you’re lying but – don’t lie anyway!
Rate your self love on a scale of 1 to 10. One represents the feeling you reserve for dog poo on the bottom of your shoe or that particular wave of emotions directed at people who loudly crinkle packets in cinemas. Five is so-so. You don’t have a massive crush on you or anything, but you wouldn’t exactly invite you out for dinner. Ten is big, fat, extra-cheesy, extra gooey self love of the highest order (and yes, you’ll be closer to that 10 by the time you reach the end of the 6 weeks)
Here’s how to use this book:
The book is divided into 6 weeks covering the main pillars of self-love, and in each of those weeks you’ll find 3 separate sections to sink your teeth into:
My favorite section; here we'll do a guided self analysis. Self enquiry is the most powerful tool to personal growth.
2. A New Habit
Positive small habits add up over time. In this section we’ll look at ways to taking the things you read and learn during these 6 weeks and making them actually come alive in your own life by developing new small and realistic habits.
3. Taking Action
After 7 days of trying on a new habit, you should be feeling pretty good. This section will be about making a single serious action or decision that reflects our new sense of self-love each day.
I would suggest starting each week on a Monday just for the ease of it, saving your big changes for the weekend, when people typically have more time. But it’s up to you.
tags: confidence, depression, self-help, personal transformation, applied psychology, self love, self esteem, meditation, self compassion, journaling, low self-esteem, low confidence, self doubt, self hatred, shyness, guilt, shame, insecurity, self confidence for women, self esteem for women, self love and self esteem, self love and acceptance, overcome anxiety
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