A sensitive exploration of common emotions and experiences through the grief that surrounds the unexpected loss of loved ones, this is an easy read about a difficult subject. The book also serves as a tribute to the author's late brother, a rising star in the exploding world of computer sciences of the early 1990s.
John Wayne Samples
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
I will openly admit to a personal bias when reading this book since the loss about which John writes touched a family with whom I have ties that reach back to my adolescent years. But beyond that, as a mental health therapist, I am always in search of resources for those who have experienced loss - resources that don't offer platitudes or pat answers from writers who bring transparency, genuineness and honesty to the process of mourning. John does that. In a culture where we are particularly ill-equipped to manage our grieving, it is refreshing to have someone who has the courage to say, in the face of loss, that it may get better, but it will not be over. It is affirming to have someone acknowledge that the questions we want to keep asking may never be answered, but we want to keep asking them anyway, and we continue to experience anger when there are no answers. It is encouraging to read that personal insight can be acquired and extended family relationships can be reframed in...
The essays, snippets and vignettes that make up this book do a great job of giving a reader who has experienced the unexpected loss of a loved one a good feel for what to expect as time passes and life changes in response to that loss. As someone who lost his father suddenly and unexpectedly seventeen years ago, I nodded in recognition while reading both the initial responses to the death of the author's brother as well as the materials that reflect learning to live with a sense of loss that may subtly change over time but never really goes away. In this book there is hope for those newly grieving as well as comfort for those continuing to miss someone who has been gone now for many years. John Wayne has done a good job of giving voice to feelings and experiences that many of us share, even though we may have often felt alone with our thoughts. There may not be answers to all of our questions as we still wrestle with coming to terms with our grief, but it helps to know that others...
Those newly grieving will be comforted by this account of a loss that captures the impact on siblings, parents, and from a lesser perspective spouse and children. Those who are in the stages of longer term grieving will find comfort in learning that you can continue to live, questioning, altered forever, in new roles, with the sense of a loved one eternally missing, but living nonetheless. The magical and mystical that is often found in grieving is well told and plausible. An excellent story.
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